Dear Alice - 11 Months

Dear Alice,

This month you are 11 months old. When did that happen?!

I seemed to curse myself last time I wrote this, as I said you were sleeping through. Since then you have been waking up once a night at 2am, which is manageable but frustrating!

You have started feeding yourself with a spoon which is quite a messy business! You are also loving blueberries and would quite happily eat a punnet every day.

You had your first go in a paddling pool and your first ice lolly in the sunshine. You loved both and had a lovely splash! You also had your first go on a swing and you were a bit unsure to start with, but ended up loving it. Obviously penguin came too.

You've started dancing to music all the time - you have better moves than me. Not difficult.

We went away to Filey for the weekend and had a lovely little break with just the 3 of us. We went swimming, played games, and just chilled out. You took me to Bridlington for Mother's Day where we had donuts on the seafront. It was a brilliant weekend away and we all got chance to relax a little.

This month I also started back at work, which is sad for so so many reasons. I'm only going back 2 days a week but it is still hard. I would love to win the lottery and look after you every day, but you are having the best time with your 2 grandmas (or should I say nanny and mama!). I just know how lucky how I am to be able to go back part time, and that you have childcare I can trust.

We have also had your first recognisable words - we've had lots of sounds before but I would say these are definite words. We have "dat" for cat, and "t" for thankyou / ta. I also think you're understanding a lot more than you're saying - you put your arms up for a hug and definitely understand "no" but you choose to ignore it!

We love you more than anything in the world,

With love and light xo

36+3 - All done at work!

So I'm currently blogging from in bed, on a new iPhone app I've just downloaded - get me! Updating as I realised I haven't posted in almost a week - where is the time going? And more importantly, where has it gone?!

Today I am nearly classed as full term (3 days off) so baby needs to hang in there for a few more days really, to make sure I'm still able to try for the lovely water birth I have requested on my checklist! I also requested one of those lovely babies that doesn't cry and sleeps a lot, just hope the list didn't get lost...

Tomorrow is my first day of maternity leave, so I have no idea how I'll feel when I wake up! I'd like to have a lovely lie in but I think that's quite unlikely, so I have lots of little jobs to do over the next few weeks. Starting with baby washing tomorrow if the weathers fit and hopefully sunny, but if not there's still lots I can do! Along with sitting - which I've been told is an order and no longer optional. I'm just not good at sitting!

To be honest, it hasn't quite set in yet that tomorrow I'm not at work. I had a lovely last day on Friday, and managed (just!) to get through the whole day without a tear, but when I got home I just sobbed. I was trying to explain to Mitchell what was wrong, yet I didn't really know myself. I think it boiled down to the huuuuge change, and just being scared. I've always known what I'm doing, or at least what I wanted to be doing, and this fear of the unknown can be very unnerving. Especially now I've read all the books, bought almost everything I need, and packed a hospital bag - I'm as ready as possible but still feel woefully unprepared!

I had a lovely last day anyway, with some lovely presents, including money for professional baby photos from everyone at work :). Had a lovely meal out too, with great food and company.

Busy weekend again, but bought a few more baby things from town yesterday and the car boot this morning, and got to catch up with some friends and family, including seeing Jess before she goes back down to Cornwall, hopefully only temporarily ;)

In pregnancy news, I'm feeling...tired. Struggling with aches and pains a little this week, but don't want to moan as I know it could be a lot worse! Luckily I have support on hand for back rubs and sympathy, but I'm definitely done with having back ache. Glad to be finished this week, I really don't think I would have managed another. I have no idea how people manage to work up to 39+ weeks - this past week I've just been exhausted!

Anyway, hoping that this posts and doesn't just disappear into the iPhone abyss! Will hopefully blog a little more now I'm not at work, so if anyone has any questions just leave a comment! Will probably post a few pictures of baby things tomorrow but open to blogging suggestions...

With love and light xo

35+5 - Baby shower!

Oh my gosh, it is now less than a month till babies due date! How crazy is that? I keep changing my mind, I'm torn between wanting her to come ASAP, and wanting another 9 months to prepare! I would definitely like an actual specific date that she will be here, all this guessing is too difficult to deal with!

First things first, my results came back all okay from the gestational diabetes test, so all is well on that front thankfully :).

This week is also my last week at work - still sorting out bits and pieces so it definitely hasn't quite sunk in yet that this time next week I won't actually be going. I have no idea how that will feel to be honest - my mum seems to think baby will be here by then so I won't actually get the week off I've been dreaming of! I've got lots of little jobs to keep me busy anyway, but I'm going to try and get some rest too on the advice of everyone else!

Last Friday night was my surprise baby shower - courtesy of the amazingly sneaky Chloe Steel, and my super secret family!

I literally had no idea at all, and it was just amazing. I could gush about what a fantastic time I had for the next few hours, but it was so lovely to see everyone and have a giggle playing ridiculous games, including:

- make a baby out of plasticine (see right for evidence!)

- put the nappy on the bear

- human nappies

- pass the baby in an unfit fashion!

It was so fantastic to see everyone and eat lots of tasty cupcakes! We got given so many lovely things, everyone was so generous, we will literally have the best dressed baby in the universe! And in true fashion, the baby shower ended up in the pub at the end of the street playing pool at 1am.

We spent all day Saturday running baby related errands, including sorting out all the clothes into sizes and what we had / hadn't got etc., so I now feel about ten million times more prepared! Also bought a few baby bits and pieces, including a moses basket and changing mat, so feel much more organised now - minus the occasional minor freakout.

Yesterday involved sorting out some more housey things which I promise I'll blog about soon, just don't like to jinx them! And this afternoon the midwife is coming to the flat to create my birth plan. Got some great choices to make, including tear or episiotomy? Can I just tick the neither box please?!

All in all, has been a busy week! So if baby can listen up and at least give me a week off work that would be much appreciated...

With love and light xo

34 - Sleeeeepy

So, there hasn't been really a lot to report in the land of babies. Today I have exactly 6 weeks left until D-Day, and seem to be doing quite well!

I'm struggling a little with work this week - just tired and achey, and I'm not good at sitting (or really able to sit down a lot as a teacher!) so I'm coming home with achey hips and knees every night. Nothing too painful, as I'm forever reminded when I hear tales of the dreaded SPD, but enough to make me want to moan about it a little!

Sleeping quite well (famous last words?) but still waking up shattered in the morning. I think it's down to waking up every hour to have to reposition pillows and roll over - I sleep well in the gaps but just don't think I'm getting proper sleep! The next person to tell me it's 'practice' for when baby comes gets kicked in the face.

Off to the midwife this afternoon, so fingers crossed I have no glucose / protein in my wee as I think then I'd have to have more tests. Also fingers crossed bump is measuring okay as I feel huuuuuuge. How can there be any more room in there for baby? I'm pretty sure if she grows any more she'll be up to my armpits.

Exciting evening tonight courtesy of the lovely MC Steelz! She won tickets to Boyzone, and a free Indian meal so I'm going as +1. I don't think I know many Boyzone songs but think I might just surprise myself and sing along alllllll the way through (sorry in advance!). Looking forward to it, but glad to have seated tickets!

Will update later about midwife,

With love and light xo

32 - The story so far...

Picture taken with my shiny new camera remote!
So today I am 32 weeks pregnant, or 8 weeks (56 days) away from my due date, a date that still seems a distance of about ten thousand years into the future!

I'm still feeling mostly very good, with very little to complain about really. Back and hip ache have been getting to be a daily thing, but nothing too crippling and certainly nothing I can't cope with – and who am I to moan about daily back rubs and getting the sofa to myself!

I've had a busy few weeks at work, and I'm really trying as hard as I can to complete my teacher training work. The deadline is the 11th June, but obviously I'm going to be somewhat preoccupied through April / May / June, so trying to get as much as possible done beforehand. This was really worrying me last week, and there have been more than a few tears shed, but I'm only one person, there are only so many hours in the day, and I can only do so much! Written myself a schedule of things I can be doing next week so really hoping to get some big chunks done.

Another thing that's been on my mind over the past few weeks is a bit of an exciting development house wise! I'm going to keep it quiet for the next few weeks, but if anyone is looking for somewhere to rent sometime in the next few months then get in touch with me :)

I've finally managed to get off my lazy bum and start doing some exercise this past month or so, not tons but more than before! Going swimming once a week, which I suppose is better than nothing. Would love to get out and do some more walking but the weather's not really been fit, hoping that this changes soon and we can get in a few nice walks before baby is here!

Sleeping a lot better lately, seem to be dead to the world this week, maybe waking up every few hours to change sides and relieve an achy hip, but other than that very well! Counting my blessings with this at the moment, as I know I'll be up every 10 seconds to pee soon enough! I'm thinking it's because my bump is so high at the moment, that she's not really pushing on my bladder. Also not waddling yet, again because I think she's so high up! This has been leading to a lot of being out of breath from going up 2 flights of stairs though.

The movements I've been feeling have definitely changed, from defined pokes and prods to more “swooshy” (?) movements, like I can feel her moving around and changing position and my whole tummy changes shape – it can be quite strange / surreal! Tried to get a video last night but she stopped as soon as I started filming obviously.

I've had 3 antenatal classes so far, and they've actually been really useful and interesting. They've only been 45 / 50 minute classes, but we've covered relaxation methods, breathing, birthing and labour positions, and other bits and pieces. The physio that takes the class is really fantastic and a big hypnobirth / natural birth advocate. Although a lot of the stuff she's going through is stuff I've already read and I'm aware of, it's very reassuring to hear a medical person repeating things back to you. I do feel a bit like the odd one out at the classes though, but I've always been a bit odd I suppose!

In other baby news, I haven't really bought anything else or done anything else! I received a gorgeous hamper full of baby things last weekend that was very much appreciated, lots of lovely things to stash away! Bought a few bits for my hospital bag on Monday but still not got round to packing it, possibly a weekend job along with trying out the car seat? I keep putting off buying things but I will get a move on soon.

I have put myself on a nappy buying hiatus until baby comes, just because I may not even get on with the cloth nappies! We have a nice little stash now, consisting mainly of Bum Genius (a combination of the V3 BTP and All-In-Ones), TotsBots (some V1 and some V2), a few Bambooty, and just some other bits and pieces I've picked up from the pre-loved board on BabyCentre! I keep meaning to take pictures of them all so I'll try and do that soon too.

Finally, a bit of a question. Those of you that have had babies before, did you wash all the clothes before they were born?

With love and light xo

30 - No news is good news right?

So, time for another instalment of what's happening in the land of Lizz and bump! I know I've been a little slack with the blog lately, but truthfully not a lot is really happening at the moment.

Yesterday I went to my first antenatal class at the hospital, as part of the physiotherapy unit. We looked at things we should / shouldn't be doing during pregnancy, some exercises to help with birth and back pain, and generally talked about body changes during pregnancy. Apparently I shouldn't be working – the thought of afternoon naps is lovely but unfortunately I don't think the money tree would agree! I enjoyed the session but looking forward to next week's session more, focusing on breathing and relaxation methods for birth.

Starting to lose some of the energy I had in the second trimester, and feeling super sleepy at the moment. I slept from 8.30 last night and still woke up tired this morning! I don't know if that's down to me waking up in the night, or just baby taking up a lot of energy at the moment. It could be entirely un-pregnancy related and just due to the fact I've got a lot on my mind, but I'm really struggling to keep my eyes open past about 5!

The back ache / hip ache has shifted up a notch this week, but work have provided me with a better chair (it's amazing!) and I've bought an exercise ball to sit on at home which actually seems to make a big difference. Don't want to complain too much, as lots of ladies have really severe problems with SPD / PGP so I feel very lucky to just have a little back ache :).

Haven't done anything more baby related to the house, or bought anything else. Trying to hold off until right at the end and I'll buy any bits and pieces we need then, but I keep having to remind myself that the shops will still be open after she's born!

Still seems to be forever away. 10 weeks, or 70 days to go until the due date, so I guess she'll be here in 84 days maximum?

And in amazing news, my cousin welcomed a GORGEOUS little girl into the world on Monday, weighing 6lb 14oz. Happy Birthday little Amelia! I haven't seen her yet but cannot wait to meet her, and find out some of the details.

Hope everyone else is okay!

With love and light xo